New Rules for Living Happily Ever?

A friend of mine sent me a link to an article on MSN entitled, New Rules for a Good Marriage. I don't know if I should take that as a hint or not, but anyway...ahem...it is quite interesting.




First off, I didn't know the divorce rate was down to 36%. Wow that's great, considering it was over 50% at one time. The article attempts to debunk certain marital myths. Here's a few:

Myth: Never go to bed angry. If you don't hash through every conflict right away, it'll lead to resentment and ultimately blowups.

New Rule: Sleep on it. Conflicts are best dealt with when you have calmed down and are well rested.

Myth: One day the two of you will just realize you've grown apart and fallen out of love.

New Rule: A marriage doesn't run on feelings — it thrives because both spouses work hard on it.

Myth: As you both get older, sex will simply stop mattering to you and your husband.

New Rule: There's no reason you won't grow more sexually connected.

Ok. I've been married for over 8 years and I find all over the above to be true. Here's my breakdown:

• I've gone to bed angry, woke up angry, stayed angry, and back to bed again angry. I'm not saying that's a recipe for a great marriage by any means. BUT I've learned the danger of choosing the wrong words. It is better to talk when you're not so heated. Giving yourself a chance to cool down and be rational works in my marriage.




• I've often wondered about the "we've just grown apart" theory. Will Smith says the recipe for his marriage to Jada is to NOT view divorce as an option. That's some profound shit. Think about it.




• I believe sex gets better as you get older in marriage for several reasons. One, the longer you have been with this person, the better they know you, that includes your body. Two, if you have kids...well if you have kids you already know. They are some cock-blocking mofos...lol. Three, for a woman, body chemistry. We begin to peak sexually in our 30's. And let these cougars out here tell it, it don't fall off til much later.

Check out the article for an "expert's" breakdown on each myth and new rule.